Sections 351-360
March 12, 2008{351} But I replied, Lord, I am a great, a very great sinner. And
he answered, “My grace is sufficient for thee.” [2 Cor.12:9] Then
I said, But, Lord, what is believing? And then I saw from that
saying, “He that cometh to me shall never hunger, and he that
believeth on me shall never thirst”, that believing and coming was
all one; and that he that came, that is, ran out in his heart and
affections after salvation by Christ, he indeed believed in Christ.
[John 6:35] Then the water stood in mine eyes, and I asked further.
But, Lord, may such a great sinner as I am be indeed accepted of
thee, and be saved by thee? And I heard him say, “And him that
cometh to me, I will in no wise cast out.” [John 6:37] Then I said,
But how, Lord, must I consider of thee in my coming to thee, that
my faith may be placed aright upon thee? Then he said, “Christ
Jesus came into the world to save sinners.” [1 Tim. 1:15] “He is
the end of the law for righteousness to every one that believeth.”
[Rom. 10:4] “He died for our sins, and rose again for our
justification.” [Rom. 4:25] “He loved us, and washed us from our
sins in his own blood.” [Rev. 1:5] “He is mediator betwixt God
and us.” [1 Tim. 2:5] “He ever liveth to make intercession for
us.” [Heb. 7:24,25] From all which I gathered, that I must look
for righteousness in his person, and for satisfaction for my sins
by his blood; that what he did in obedience to his Father’s law,
and in submitting to the penalty thereof, was not for himself, but
for him that will accept it for his salvation, and be thankful.
And now was my heart full of joy, mine eyes full of tears, and mine
affections running over with love to the name, people, and ways of
Jesus Christ.
{352} CHR. This was a revelation of Christ to your soul indeed;
but tell me particularly what effect this had upon your spirit.
HOPE. It made me see that all the world, notwithstanding all the
righteousness thereof, is in a state of condemnation. It made me
see that God the Father, though he be just, can justly justify the
coming sinner. It made me greatly ashamed of the vileness of my
former life, and confounded me with the sense of mine own ignorance;
for there never came thought into my heart before now that showed
me so the beauty of Jesus Christ. It made me love a holy life,
and long to do something for the honour and glory of the name of
the Lord Jesus; yea, I thought that had I now a thousand gallons
of blood in my body, I could spill it all for the sake of the Lord
Jesus.
{353} I saw then in my dream that Hopeful looked back and saw
Ignorance, whom they had left behind, coming after. Look, said he
to Christian, how far yonder youngster loitereth behind.
CHR. Ay, ay, I see him; he careth not for our company.
HOPE. But I trow it would not have hurt him had he kept pace with
us hitherto.
CHR. That is true; but I warrant you he thinketh otherwise.
HOPE. That, I think, he doth; but, however, let us tarry for him.
So they did.
{354} Then Christian said to him, Come away, man, why do you stay
so behind?
IGNOR. I take my pleasure in walking alone, even more a great deal
than in company, unless I like it the better.
Then said Christian to Hopeful, (but softly), Did I not tell you
he cared not for our company? But, however, said he, come up, and
let us talk away the time in this solitary place. Then directing
his speech to Ignorance, he said, Come, how do you? How stands it
between God and your soul now?
{355} Ignorance’s hope, and the ground of it
IGNOR. I hope well; for I am always full of good motions, that come
into my mind, to comfort me as I walk.
CHR. What good motions? pray, tell us.
IGNOR. Why, I think of God and heaven.
CHR. So do the devils and damned souls.
IGNOR. But I think of them and desire them.
CHR. So do many that are never like to come there. “The soul of
the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing.” [Prov. 13:4]
IGNOR. But I think of them, and leave all for them.
CHR. That I doubt; for leaving all is a hard matter: yea, a harder
matter than many are aware of. But why, or by what, art thou
persuaded that thou hast left all for God and heaven.
{356} IGNOR. My heart tells me so.
CHR. The wise man says, “He that trusts his own heart is a fool.”
[Prov. 28:26]
IGNOR. This is spoken of an evil heart, but mine is a good one.
CHR. But how dost thou prove that?
IGNOR. It comforts me in hopes of heaven.
CHR. That may be through its deceitfulness; for a man’s heart may
minister comfort to him in the hopes of that thing for which he
yet has no ground to hope.
IGNOR. But my heart and life agree together, and therefore my hope
is well grounded.
CHR. Who told thee that thy heart and life agree together?
IGNOR. My heart tells me so.
CHR. Ask my fellow if I be a thief! Thy heart tells thee so! Except
the Word of God beareth witness in this matter, other testimony is
of no value.
{357} IGNOR. But is it not a good heart that hath good thoughts?
and is not that a good life that is according to God’s commandments?
CHR. Yes, that is a good heart that hath good thoughts, and that
is a good life that is according to God’s commandments; but it is
one thing, indeed, to have these, and another thing only to think
so.
IGNOR. Pray, what count you good thoughts, and a life according to
God’s commandments?
CHR. There are good thoughts of divers kinds; some respecting
ourselves, some God, some Christ, and some other things.
IGNOR. What be good thoughts respecting ourselves?
CHR. Such as agree with the Word of God.
{358} IGNOR. When do our thoughts of ourselves agree with the Word
of God?
CHR. When we pass the same judgment upon ourselves which the Word
passes. To explain myself — the Word of God saith of persons in
a natural condition, “There is none righteous, there is none that
doeth good.” [Rom. 3] It saith also, that “every imagination of
the heart of man is only evil, and that continually.” [Gen. 6:5]
And again, “The imagination of man’s heart is evil from his youth.”
[Rom. 8:21] Now then, when we think thus of ourselves, having
sense thereof, then are our thoughts good ones, because according
to the Word of God.
IGNOR. I will never believe that my heart is thus bad.
CHR. Therefore thou never hadst one good thought concerning thyself
in thy life. But let me go on. As the Word passeth a judgment
upon our heart, so it passeth a judgment upon our ways; and when
OUR thoughts of our hearts and ways agree with the judgment which
the Word giveth of both, then are both good, because agreeing
thereto.
{359} IGNOR. Make out your meaning.
CHR. Why, the Word of God saith that man’s ways are crooked ways;
not good, but perverse. [Ps. 125:5, Prov. 2:15] It saith they
are naturally out of the good way, that they have not known it.
[Rom. 3] Now, when a man thus thinketh of his ways, — I say, when
he doth sensibly, and with heart-humiliation, thus think, then hath
he good thoughts of his own ways, because his thoughts now agree
with the judgment of the Word of God.
{360} IGNOR. What are good thoughts concerning God?
CHR. Even as I have said concerning ourselves, when our thoughts
of God do agree with what the Word saith of him; and that is, when
we think of his being and attributes as the Word hath taught, of
which I cannot now discourse at large; but to speak of him with
reference to us: Then we have right thoughts of God, when we
think that he knows us better than we know ourselves, and can see
sin in us when and where we can see none in ourselves; when we
think he knows our inmost thoughts, and that our heart, with all
its depths, is always open unto his eyes; also, when we think that
all our righteousness stinks in his nostrils, and that, therefore,
he cannot abide to see us stand before him in any confidence, even
in all our best performances.